And not only is this my fiftieth post on my blog, I've decided to make this post pretty darn special and recall one of those events that changes the way you think about stuff.
It was this summer that I had to break it off with a friend that had long abandoned me for a cooler crowd. I don't want to do any name-calling on the Internet. This post is not to rag on this person. This is to tell my side of the story about one of the events that seems to have shaped my adolescence.
Lets call the girl Tuesday. I think that will do.
Tuesday and I met when I was younger and she younger than me by a year. She seemed nice enough. We talked some. And then I found out she liked Lord of the Rings. Now I had an obsession with LOTR, not to mention my first crush on Elijah Wood was still in tact (and still is) so we get to talking. And apparently, Tuesday had been living under a rock, because I asked her if she'd read Harry Potter, and she didn't even know anything about the Boy Who Lived.
So I start explaining all things Harry Potter to her, and her eyes became wide with excitement, and within the next three months she finished them all. And she became more obsessed than I was. Which is saying something, as I'm the crazy chick who has a wizard rock project.
And for a while, everything was great. We wrote, well, I wrote a Lord of the Rings and Harry Potter musical (I still have them. I hope to preform one of them someday) and she gave occasional input. We read some of the same things. But Harry Potter was really the only thing we had in common. And I mean the only thing. Tuesday didn't care much for music (except for Taylor Swift), and I probably cared too much about certain artists (I'd just discovered Florence + The Machine.... if you know what that feels like, cut me some slack). I was into weird hipster films and she was still watching Megamind.
And then we just stopped hanging out. She didn't call to have me over or spend the night or anything. And I didn't either. The only way we talked was over the phone when Tuesday was really bored. And that's where the real trouble began.
Tuesday called me up one day, and started going on about how she'd been trying to change her image, to be more girly at her mom's insistence. I told her I believed one shouldn't have to do that and it turned into a very big argument. She told me people thought I was a lesbian, I could get a boy-friend if just wore some make up. That I could be as pretty as a beauty queen. But I didn't want that.
That thread continued for while with lots of continued phone hang-ups, name-calling, and exasperation. And then the Midnight premiere of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2 came. Tuesday allegedly had tickets. And if you've been reading closely, you know that some friends took me with them and I cried and it was great.
But Neville's story really stuck with me after the movie. How he grew from a scared kid to a super hero who led a rebellion against one of the most powerful wizards of all time. And when Tuesday called me the next day, saying she'd forgotten about the premiere and didn't go and simply wanted to know every detail. But for some reason the conversation veered off and I ended up hanging up on her after she called me a whimp that played too much music and watched too many movies for her own good.
That night I was flipping through Philosopher's Stone, and read that famous Dumbledore quote:
"It takes courage to stand up to your enemies, but even more to stand up to your friends."
And then something clicked.
When Tuesday called again, I refused to talk to her. She left a snarling message for me, but I was done. And with that it was over. I took a page out of Neville's book, and I think I'm better off now.
I still see Tuesday at church. We don't talk. I think she's happy with the arrangement. She's got new friends and so do I. I'm trying to move on as best I can. You just have to be bulletproof in situations like this.
But Tuesday, if you are reading this, which you probably aren't, but that's ok, I do forgive you. I understand that you want to go be a popular kid and you weren't happy with being a nerd with me anymore. But you really left me high and dry. But I'm better now. So much better than I used to be. You really did pull me down. I don't think you meant to at first, but you did. But I'm happy to say I've learned from experience.
It's ironic how the thing that brought me and Tuesday together also gave me the courage to break it off. Thanks Neville, and thanks J.K. Rowling.
-Randi
No comments:
Post a Comment